Grandparents As Parents Support Group

A senior’s golden years are often impacted by unforeseen situations. One of the most momentous scenarios is suddenly becoming a parent to their grandchild. This often happens when a senior’s son or daughter is absent from their own child’s life due to mental/physical illness, substance issues, abandonment, incarceration, or death.

 

The SCV Senior Center’s online (Zoom) support group, “Grandparents as Parents” embraces these seniors and strives to help them by offering support, understanding, self-expression, and the emotional tools needed for taking care of themselves as they care for their grandchildren.

 

“Many seniors who are thrust into the role of ‘second time around’ parents feel overwhelmed by their circumstances, they did not see this coming in their later years,” stated the group’s facilitator, SCVSC Mental Health Specialist Etta Martin, LCSW. “Your life is turned upside down and it takes a toll. Many grandparents as parents experience higher than normal rates of depression, poverty, and chronic health problems, like diabetes and hypertension. They also report feeling exhausted, lonely and without privacy, and their own needs frequently go unmet. Our support group is here to help them.”

 

The purpose of the group is to assist grandparents who might be struggling with complicated feelings about their own child and with the mixture of associated needs and demands, such as feelings of disappointment, embarrassment, anger, and resentment, Martin explained.

 

“They might also be grieving for a child who either died or simply walked away, and for the vision they once had of a simple, ordinary, fun-with-the-grandkids kind of grandparenthood,” she said.

Martin noted that the proportion of children living in “grandfamilies” has doubled in the United States since 1970, and has risen some seven-percent in the past five years alone – an increase that many researchers attribute to the opioid epidemic.

According to the Centers for Disease Control, about three percent of children nationwide live apart from their parents, and of those, nearly two-thirds are being raised by grandparents.

“Some 2.6 million grandparents are raising their grandchildren,” Martin stated.

Despite the strains and challenges of raising one’s grandchildren, many seniors also report that there are unexpected rewards in doing so.

“Many grandparents say they feel younger because of being involved again in the day-to-day lives of their grandchildren, running to after-school activities, or reading Harry Potter and teen magazines to keep current,” Martin said.

They also have a renewed sense of purpose at a time in life when many fellow seniors report feeling less engaged and relevant.

“The kids can really benefit, too,” the therapist added. “According to certain studies, children raised by their grandparents have fewer behavioral problems than those who end up in foster care with non-relatives. Add to that the emotional security of remaining with their own loved ones and it can be a tremendously rewarding situation for everyone involved.”

Grandparents As Parents meets online via Zoom every Thursday from 10-11 a.m. In the near future, the group will be offered both in-person at the Senior Center as well as by Zoom.

If you are interested in being part of the group, please contact Etta Martin @ emartin@scv-seniorcenter.org

You may also call her at (818) 512-8236.